Check out this conversation from A Perfect Murder, one of my favorite movies:
Bobby: People with money...they're different than you and me.
Mo: How's that?
Bobby: They got a fuck of a lot more money, for one thing.
Bobby was right. People with money spend it on shit like doggy psychiatrists, oxygen facials, and the overpriced orgy of Neiman Marcus.
Don't believe me? Check out this subject line of an email I got from Neiman Marcus the other day:
"Spring Trend: TRIBAL! A mix of the avant and adventurous."
Tribal? The fuck? Surely you don't mean that they take the "exotic" look of starving, war-weary people and exploit it for monetary gain? Yep, that's exactly what it is.
Let's get right to the good stuff:
Got an event that's just begging for a "faux python halter caftan" (and an extra $3,595 lying around)? Here you go (nice shoes, bitch):
Or perhaps you've got a charity event to support starving tribes in Africa and you're looking for the perfect $6990 empathetic outfit:
Don't forget your accessories, girls! This fugly chunk of wood hanging on a piece of braided leather wooden pendant necklace is a steal for $570!
Every last detail counts. This clutch? purse? I don't know? "painted python minaudiere"--for only $2148--will lend your outfit ensemble that real je ne sais what the fuck tribal quality:
You know you have to do, girls! Like any other tribal-dweller, it's time to hop in your Mercedes, meet your girls for a mimosa brunch, get massages and mani-pedis, head on over for an afternoon of credit card exercises at Neiman Marcus, then treat yourself to a $10 designer latte and cupcake! See you there, bitches!
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