Tuesday, December 27, 2011

People Watching

So there I was. Had the day off. Decided to spend it doing one of my favorite things: poking around in other people's shit. Sometimes that means going to an estate sale (ooooh, dead people--THEY'RE MY FAVORITE!), a yard sale, a flea market, or any other such place, but today that meant going to a couple of antique/junk stores.

There's no question that I find it fun to shop for "pre-loved" stuff in much the same way that some folks love to shop at Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, or the local feed store. But what I really love is the experience. The poking around (heh heh). The sifting. And...the people watching.

Remember how I called out grown women who wear the word "PINK" emblazoned across their asses? Behold. And in pink rhinestones, no less. KlASSy.



And check out this here hipster. Tight pants? Check. Scarf? Oh yes. Sideswept bangs poking out of his hat? You know it. Jackie O sunglasses worn indoors on a cloudy day? Yes ma'am. On the phone constantly? Believe it. Uses the words "amazing" and "fabulous" to describe every single thing? Ooooh, girl!

And: he was straight. Was there with his girlfriend, who was carrying a little dog in her purse (ugh). That's right, kids--straight men sometimes look like and act like this. I'm as disturbed as you are.


And it took me forever to check out at one store in particular. Like a loser, I apparently failed to understand how important the cashier was. She took a break in the middle of my transaction to text "LOL" to her friend. I wish I was joking.



And look at this bad-ass guard dog keeping watch at the register of another store:


And finally. There were two entire rooms of this one store (a converted old enormous house) devoted to vintage clothing, jewelry, and accessories. Check out this hot piece I encountered trying on a very sexy pair of glasses:



EXCUSE MY BEAUTY!



(Just so you know, I could not see A THING when I snapped that pic. Those glasses were so strong that the world was gray and blurry.) The shit I do to entertain you sexy bastards. I swear.

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