Because Lucille gets meaner than a dog shittin' tacks if she has to hold her bladder for more than one minute, we always go on our morning Glamour Walk as soon as the alarm goes off. This means that, during the week, I pick up her steamy little piles in the dark. Sexy, I know. Try to restrain yourselves.
On the weekends, though, the alarm is OFF, bitches. This means that there's usually a bit of daylight for our morning Glamour Walk. And because my eyes are as sensitive a beauty pageant stage mother, I wear sunglasses in the tiniest bit of light.
Anyway, as I was picking up a hot handful of shit last Saturday, it occurred to me what a vision of loveliness all the passers-by were getting as they flew by:
Look familiar?
Slow down, boys...there's enough Sweet Tea to go around. Play your cards right and maybe you'll get to pick up Lucy's shit one of these days.
Form a line, please...no pushing.
Have a good weekend, dear bleadership! See you kittens right back here on Monday.
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